Out of all the pain I've been through. After all the sadness, the tears and the frustration. After many sleepless nights, b*tching and complaining. After telling you everything that I needed to say; after you telling me we can't be friends, that I'm a disappointment, that I'm kind of immature and a kind of a bad decision...After being hurt, confused and lost. I STILL miss you. As much as I say that I don't want to see you, that I don't want to talk to you; a part of me still longs for that moment when I see you or for a moment where we talk for a brief moment.
I don't know why. I can't explain it myself. I can't understand why. But for some odd reason, deep down inside, through all the hurt and pain you've caused, I really still do miss you. I know its bad, I know I should stay away and I have been keeping my distance, but although it doesn't hurt as much I still want to feel your presence. Weird I know. I still think about you, I still have feelings for you, BUT moving on is my number one priority. I've been good at keeping at that. Keeping my distance, ignoring you, fighting my emotions. Just have to keep at it.
Sometimes I wish though....that somehow I can tell you I miss you, or somehow you would know that I do. Sometimes I wonder if you miss me too or think about me the way that I think about you sometimes.
I really don't know. But day after day, it gets easier and easier to get through this little obstacle. I'm trying and I'll keep at it...
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